Bury me with this post.
I don’t think we take enough time to appreciate the periods in our life when our noses aren’t runny. Is your nose runny right now? No? Think about that. Honestly reflect on it. Enjoy this era of peace. There are dark times on the horizon
Last night I was at McDonald’s with one of my friend’s and that man started to randomly ask us questions like “how old are y’all?” And “do yall have boyfriends?” At first we were like what, why is he asking us and then five minutes later he said ” You know.. I have been married to the most amazing woman in the whole world for 52 years and we’ve been together for 55. But I don’t think there’s ever going to be another year after tonight or tomorrow night” ..by this time we just turned to him and starting listening to him. “You see, my sweet lady is in the hospital right now, she has cancer. I just came back from there right now and even with all of the tubes, she still looks so beautiful. Tomorrow is certain to be her last day if it doesn’t happen tonight and Im not going to church in the morning because I want to spend every waking moment with her by her side. I love her so much.. it hurts. I don’t know what I’m going to do without her. I don’t want to be without her.” ..by this time he had tears in his eyes, got up with struggle and said ” well it was nice talking to you ladies, but I have to go home to the dark to prepare and give this cheeseburger to my puppy.” And that was it, we just listened to him, and he left. This whole day I’ve been bothered because I have been complaining about how I can’t finish some damn essay while this man is about to or just lost his whole world.
you can smell someone peeling an orange from literally 40 miles away
If you don’t use an empty house to sing obnoxiously and off key in your underwear you are doing life wrong
that’s the spirit
OH MY FUCKING GOD DO YOU KNOW WHAT YOU JUST FUCKING SAID? DO YOU REALIZE HOW AMAZING THAT PUN WAS? THATS THE SPIRIT???!?!?! THAT IS THE FUCKING SPIRIT YOU DICKSUCKING FUCKBUCKET THAT IS THE FUCKING SPIRIT. THAT IS ALCOHOL. NAY, NOT SIMPLY ALCOHOL. IT IS A SPIRIT. YOU ARE LITERALLY LOOKING AT THE BOTTLE OF BOOZE HE IS DRINKING, AND YOU ARE POINTING OUT THATS THE SPIRIT WHILE SIMULTANEOUSLY APPLAUDING HIM FOR DRINKING DURING GRADUATION BY SAYING THATS THE SPIRIT. YOU MY GOOD SIR HAVE SUCCEEDED TODAY. YOU HAVE SUCCEEDED IN MAKING ME PHYSICALLY BOW TOWARDS YOUR GREATNESS.
THATS THE SPIRIT.
THAT IS THE FUCKING SPIRIT.
That is the best reaction to a pun I have ever seen